What is I'm Listening?
I'm Listening is a simple and scalable exercise where everyday people (Listening Leaders) model how to have respectful, vulnerable cross-aisle conversations.
They show how it's possible to decrease our society's intense polarization.
The core premise is just two words: "I'm listening."
Who Can Be a Listening Leader?
Listening Leaders are everyday people (like you!) who are tired of complaining about the divide in our world. Instead, they're committed to doing something about it, and starting on a hyper local level. They practice deep listening to diffuse political polarization and build connection.
You don’t need a specific degree or experience, just a willingness to try to listen and find the humanity in people across the aisle. This isn't about convincing or debating with the other side—just practicing curiosity and genuinely listening.
As a Listening Leader, you model the understanding and connection of the Enemies Project conversations in your local community.
(Don't worry, all you need is to be openminded and have a willingness to learn — we'll guide you through the rest.)
Core Values
Curiosity
We set aside our need to be right and choose to listen with genuine open-mindedness and non-judgmental curiosity.
Humanize the "Enemy"
We prioritize understanding the story and values behind the other person's beliefs, allowing us to see them as a fellow human, not a political threat.
Model The Change
We demonstrate that respectful, vulnerable cross-aisle conversations are possible, inspiring others to drop the judgment and fear.
How We Can Support You!
This isn't about being an expert; it's about being willing. If you are passionate about fostering connection across the aisle and ready to practice deep listening, then you have what it takes to be a Listening Leader and being the change you want to see in our public discourse.
Sign up to receive the free, comprehensive Listening Leader Starter Guide, which includes:
-
Equipment list and set-up process (total cost less than $100).
-
Printable signs and an easy-to-read Intro Script.
-
The 5 Core Questions to guide powerful conversations.
-
Tips for Emotional Regulation and clear Conversation Exit Strategies.
-
Access to a supportive community of Listening Leaders around the globe.
1. The Set Up:
Just two chairs, a simple sign that says "I'm Listening," and your phone to record. Full instructions and printable sign templates are included in your Starter Guide.
2. The Conversation:
You invite passersby (those with opposing political views) to sit down for a short (5–15 minute) chat.
3. The Goal:
You, the listener, ask the 5 Core Questions (listed in the Starter Guide) to help build connection. You listen to understand, not to convince or debate with them.
4. The Impact:
You submit your recorded clips to The Enemies Project. We then compile these moments of hope and connection from around the globe and share them online, showing the world how small acts of listening can break the "Enemy Trance."
How Does It Work?
Listening is Hard—That's Why It Matters
You might be thinking: "I'm not Larry Rosen! I can't mediate two people like that."
And you don't have to. Larry is a professional peacemaker, but the power of this project lies in ordinary people practicing the same skills he's honed: how to stay open, curious, and withhold judgment.
When you listen deeply, the other person often experiences a profound sense of feeling heard, respected, and understood—a priceless gift in today's polarized climate. This profound feeling is what ultimately diffuses hostility.
If you're like most people, you were never taught these skills. That's why we created the Listening Leaders Starter Guide, to give you all the support you need to practice having these productive, transformative moments with "enemies" on the other side.
What's in it for you?
You get to know you’re actively working to be the change you want to see in the world. And by doing so, you’re not only positively connecting with another person, you’re also exercising your own skills of listening and withholding judgement, which helps in every area of life.
What's in it for them (the stranger you listen to)?
They may, for the first time, get to feel truly seen. When someone listens without judgment, they gain a moment of clarity and take the temperature down on the "us vs. them" fight. They’re not enemies; they’re us.
Why record it?
As a Listening Leader, you're not just having a conversation; you are creating a small moment of hope. When we share these clips widely, we model how to listen and give the world a hopeful alternative to the constant judgment and division.